Is mentorship right for me, right now?

Professional development is one of the self-care techniques that can help us during stressful times. It tells our systems we’re okay, that our environment is safe enough to consider the future, and that growth is possible. Mentorship is one way to access professional development in a meaningful way.

But how do you know if mentorship is right for you, right now? Mentoring might be for you if:

• You know the type of work you want to do and have some specifics in mind, but need some direction from a knowledgeable guide

• You want a particular position and are willing to work hard over time to build skills and your network to achieve it

• You’ve heard of or seen someone in a position that you think you would like to work at, and you’re not sure how to get to that level

• You have a general sense that you want to change work areas (say, from fire response to hydrology, or from finance to HR), and need to gather more information

A mentor isn’t going to lead you down the trail to the new position outright, but they can point out stepping stones that appear to you as you go along. Some of them will be more obvious than others, and may only be visible to someone who’s trod there before.

How do you choose a mentor?

It might be obvious who your mentor should be (or already is!) or you might have to take a critical look. Look around where you are right now, and maybe ask two friends for their experience with people in the field you’re aiming to work in. Were you a part of a leadership development program several years back? Ask your cohort for their recommendations. Reach back in your employment history, and talk to colleagues you worked with five years ago. Do you have a former supervisor that you stay in touch with? Ask her who she would recommend you talk to about building skills for your next job.

Look and listen for a person who shows both knowledge and humanity. They have skills and they are interested in sharing them. This may not be the name you hear most often in professional circles (that might be the most outgoing person). Sometimes it’s quiet leadership that builds a reputation: they are good at their job, kind, and future-facing.

Sometimes the best mentor is the person who arrived where you’re trying to go quite recently. They’ve just been down the path you’re traveling, so they remember where the obstacles are or where the trail splits off and gets confusing. A person who walked that path 15 years ago had to navigate a different space, but the person who arrived 2-3 years ago probably walked a pretty similar trail to the one you now face. Maybe they are the right person to show you the way.

A mentor should be someone who has more experience than you do in your next career area, but doesn’t necessarily have more overall experience. Can a mentor be younger than you? Absolutely. You might have worked in finance for 20 years, while they have spent 10 years in HR. If you’re looking to transition from finance to HR, they’ve seen the HR section of trail and can offer you pointers.

Photo by Wes Hicks on Unsplash

There’s another side to mentorship as well. You as the mentee can provide fresh perspective and sometimes crossover skills to your mentor. Win-win. If you’re considering asking for a mentor, it can be a great idea to also become one. There is always something you can share with those newer to your field than you are, and it’ll put you in your mentor’s shoes (to a certain extent), allowing you to be an even better mentee.

How to be a great mentee

Being a great mentee is about knowing what you want at work, communicating it clearly, and being open to new ideas. Once you’ve identified a mentor and asked them for a formal relationship, you need to drive the interaction.

• A mentee should send calendar invites, initiate phone calls on time, and reach out to share information with their mentor between formal appointments – When your mentor is approaching a major project deadline, ask whether your mentor wants you to step up and help out to gain experience, or to step back and give them space for a few weeks.

• A mentee should keep notes and set meeting agendas – You’re responsible for organizing and synthesizing the information and wisdom you receive from your mentor. Stay organized, contemplate between calls, and collect notes and thoughtful questions for your next session.

• A mentee should know where they want to go, but be open to detours – Perhaps your mentor wants you to gain this type of experience but you think it’s a waste of time. Talk it through; you both have good reasons. Remember there’s a reason you chose this person: they can see more of this particular hillside trail than you can.

• A mentee and mentor should discuss bringing the formal relationship to an end when the mentee has reached their goal – Have you learned all you can from your mentor for now? Both your and your mentor’s time is valuable and precious. Keep lines of communication open, but don’t send a year’s worth of calendar events without discussing why. You might come back to your mentor for advice from time to time, but perhaps their role as primary guide in your career has reached its end for now.

Some of the great mentors in my life have arrived accidentally, some of them without my even wanting a mentor in that moment. But they saw what I was doing and how I was doing it, and they saw some next steps for me that I couldn’t have seen. They had walked more trail than I had and known many other hikers, and so they knew where I might stumble and where the handholds are, and when there’s a steep enough incline that it can only be done with the help of other hikers.

If now is the time for you to seek out help and grow your network through mentorship, ask around, be observant, and drive that change you’re looking for. If you're not sure if now is the time, or whom you should ask, or where you're trying to go in your career, please call me. I'd love to work with you.