It's that time of year! New year's resolutions are here (cue scary music). You probably know someone who's going to have a Dry January, or joining a gym, or finally writing a book. You've tried setting new years resolutions and they didn't work — you don't want to fail again.
Luckily there's some science-tested ways to actually make a change for yourself that sticks. Let's try them together this year.
Establish short time frames for success
The best way to reach your new year's resolution is not to have one. Instead of setting goals for yourself for an entire year, set short-term goals for a month or a quarter. You can wrap your mind around doing something for a month. And "oh jeez, the month starts tomorrow and it's only 31 days long! I'd better get started."
Yes, that sense of urgency really matters. 12 months is too long: you'll put your goal off until "later." Summer is far away, you've got plenty of time to start doing Pilates (again), right? You're not going to Peru until November, you've got plenty of time to start learning Quechua, right?
Establishing shorter term intentions for yourself allows your mind to imagine how doing the activity will fit into your daily life.
Don't wait for some Grand Event to make a Big Change appear in your life. You won't magically have time and energy for something new, you have to plan for it, adjust, and rebalance.
Do one thing at a time
Often when change is afoot, we want to change several things at once. The desire is there, but it takes too much energy and requires we change too much of our existing routine to make them all happen. Humans are creatures of habit, so whatever you're doing now is likely to continue. Building in just one small change to your current circumstance can be challenging enough. Succeed at that one change, and you'll be starting from a new norm.
The added beauty of setting a monthly or quarterly intention is that we can set a different one next month. This newness can prevent boredom and help us build on past successes. Especially if we set cascading goals that fit together.
Photo by Dmitrii Vaccinium on Unsplash
In January, replace one meal just once a week with a salad to get more leafy greens in your life. In February, participate in meatless Mondays. In March, learn a new leafy greens recipe and cook it once a week. By April, you're skipping meat once a week, you've got a salad in the mix once a week and you've got four new veggie recipes to deploy whenever you want. Changing one thing can compound positive change in powerful ways.
For a month, walk 2 miles four times a week. The next month, you might walk 3 miles twice a week and jog 1 mile twice a week. Maybe by the third month you're jogging 2 miles four times a week. Then you can decide what happens next.
By keeping your attention on just one thing, you're applying that sense of urgency I described in #1 above, and also allowing your mind to rest by changing to a new focus next month, all while building on the recent past to keep making progress.
Set your mind to leading indicators, not lagging ones
The end result of anything is easy to say, but hard to make happen. Sure I can see myself being interviewed on morning television about my fabulous new novel, but can I actually get the book written and sold? By setting leading indicators we can reach incredibly lofty goals, one step at a time. Here's some examples of the difference between lagging and leading indicators. Note how leading indicators are actionable and lagging indicators are just great ideas.
Lagging indicator | Leading indicator |
|---|---|
Lose 15 pounds | Keep a food journal every day for 30 days |
Write a book | Write 2000 words a day, even if I don't have an idea |
Be more compassionate | Read two novels this month |
Improve my relationship with ______ | Call, text, or email _____ once a week with a positive note |
Get my homework done on time | Do two hours of homework every day, even when it's not due tomorrow |
So can I join you on this journey? What leading indicators are you going to set for your first month or the first three months of the year? I'd love to hear what you're planning and, periodically, let me know how it's going.
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